Father as Prophet
As priests, we represent our family to God, but as prophets we represent God to our family. Being prophetic is not determined merely by what we say but more importantly, by how we play the role of a prophet in our family.
Modeling
- Be an Appetizer
Prov.22:6 – “Train up a child the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it”
“Train” – the word in the original language literally means to “make it appetizing or palatable”. That means we as parents should make God appetizing to our children so that even as they grow old, they would not depart from it. Because of our example, they will always have the desire to delight themselves in the Lord.
Titus 2:9-10 – “Exhort bondservants to be obedient to their own masters, to be well pleasing in all things, not answering back, not pilfering, but showing all good fidelity, that they may adorn the doctrine of God our Saviour in all things.”
In this scripture, Paul is exhorting Titus to encourage the slaves to be obedient to their own masters…showing all good fidelity, so that through their lives, they make the doctrine of God attractive to their masters. In the light of this, how much more we as parents should make God attractive to our children through our lives.
Many have a wrong image of God because of the failure of their earthly fathers. As fathers we have the great propensity to misrepresent God to our family. (As our children acknowledge God as ‘Father’, they also call us ‘Father’). If the father is loving and responsible, it is easy for a child to picture a loving, caring and faithful God. However, if the father is critical, abusive, absent or irresponsible, the child will begin life with a negative image about God as we tend to superimpose our relationship with our earthly father to our relationship with our heavenly Father.
There are four kinds of love in human relationship on this earth:
Storge Love – Family love, an affectionate love between family members. There is a special affection between family members which is stronger than the affection we have with friends.
Phileo Love - Friendship love, an affectionate love between friends. Love for our brothers and sisters in Christ. Jonathon and David in the bible had great phileo love for each other. (1Sam.18:1; 2Sam.1:26)
Eros Love - Physical or sexual love, an affectionate love between a man and a woman. While this is most perverted by the devil; however, it is not evil (Heb.13:4)
Agape love - God's kind of love which is unconditional. This love has been poured out and imparted to us (Rom.5:5) so that we can love Him back and love others. If developed healthily, it does not only reach people we know, but it also reaches to our enemies too.
Unfortunately, many people suffer and go through a lot of pain, hurt and rejection in the Father’s love, because of the failure of family love. Thus, we grew up with a very negative message on the Father heart of God. God loves all of us equally, but due to our negative experience, not all of us are able to receive or embrace the love of God equally. We often struggle and find it hard to rest in His love, which is the foundation of faith.
In fact, many adult bondage and destructive habits can trace the root problems to unhealthy family love. Many use these habits (immorality, alcohol, drugs, gambling, workaholic, etc.) as escape routes or to medicate their pain as they are actually craving for genuine love.
The mother’s love is often depicted as sacrificial, beautiful and irreplaceable, but a mother’s love alone is not enough. There is a difference in quality between the love of a mother and that of a father. The love of the father imparts a sense of strength, security, importance and value. And when it is lacking in a child’s life, it often results in deep inner wounds – a sense of being unimportant and unwanted. A study of young adults found that those who were emotionally close to their fathers lived, on the whole, happier and more satisfied lives regardless of their feelings toward their mothers.
Be an Authentic Disciple
In the Gospel, when the Pharisees asked Jesus, “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?” Jesus said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.” (Matt.22:36-37)
If loving God is the great commandment as a disciple of Christ, then as parents, our greatest call is to inspire our children to love God through our lives. Discipleship starts at home!
Children do not necessarily like all the values or characteristic of their parents, and do not always accept the role models they have been given. In fact, one of the reasons that cause rebellion is the process called ‘disidentification’ – an identify they build from a dislike of certain aspects of their parent, and the intent to not be like them. Hence, our lives as parents can cause them to identify or ‘disidentify’ with the God we serve.
Points to Ponder:
Fathers, through our lives, we are painting a portrait of God for our children. What does the portrait look like?