Father as Prophet - 2

Eph.5:25 – “Husbands love your wives…” is a mission statement rather than just some advice. Husbands are called to lay down their lives for their wives, even as Christ laid down His life for the church.

Second Responsibility as Prophet to our family - to Inspire a Godly Marriage!

Another vital responsibility of parents is to equip our children for a successful marriage.

The best way of equipping is modeling. Example is the very foundation of influence, and we can “teach” only what we “are” – no more, no less. Hence, our role modeling as parents to our children is our most basic, most sacred, most spiritual responsibility. Our marriage, whether we like it or not, is a prophetic message to the next generation – and it can turn out to be a positive or sadly, a negative message.

Gen.2:21-23 – “And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept, and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man”

This scripture gives us an account of the creation of humanity. I think it is deserving to note that in the very next verse, a critical marriage principle of “leaving and cleaving” is mentioned – “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh”

Many parents tend to focus their parenting responsibility in raising their kids to be successful in the other six Spheres in the society. We focus on developing children with high intelligence but neglected in developing them with healthy emotion. Today, we have a society full of people with a “A1 Head” and a “F9 Heart”. The Result – we have many “successful” individuals in society, in terms of careers, but with weak marriages that cannot bless the society. Family life is the foundation for the health of societies and nations.

Once I was ministering in Fortaleza Brazil for YWAM Family Ministry School. At the end of the session, a lady gave a feedback that propels me into a deeper commitment to focus on family ministry. She says “Go back and tell your financial partners and supporters, you have come to Brazil but never ministered to any of the streets kids here and never visited any prisoners who are involved in drugs, crime, etc. However, your teaching and sharing here has helped to equip us to prevent all these from happening in the future.”

According to the federal government of Brazil, there are about two hundred thousand street children. The lack of stability in family life is the main reason for a child taking to the streets. Street children have experienced domestic violence at the hands of their parents. They turn to the streets as an answer to escape. The child realizes that they cannot trust their parents and no other authority figure. They soon start drugs which to them is a mental escape; a strategy to survive. Sorrowfully, it was believed that the nation even resorted to killing the street children to “clean the streets” ahead of the Olympic Games 2016 to be hosted in Rio de Janeiro.

With that ‘revelation’, I coined the statement - “A dysfunctional marriage creates a dysfunctional family, which then creates a dysfunctional individual, and a dysfunctional individual ultimately creates a dysfunctional society.

I’m not sure that there is any category of pain worse than family pain. For that reason, I believe that God has called our attention to marriage immediately after He created humanity.

If you have a son you would have to model for him how to be a godly loving husband & father. He will learn how to love his wife and family through you. If you have a daughter, your model gives her wisdom to make the right choices for her future husband. The way we handle their hearts, is also how they will allow their hearts be handled by others.

We have to genuinely ask ourselves this question, “If my daughter married someone who will treat her as how you treat your wife, would you rejoice? Likewise, if your son treats your future daughter-in-law in that same manner you treat your wife, will you be proud of him?”

2Cor.3:18 – “But we all with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the spirit of the Lord.”

We become what we behold. We learn more from example than through advice. Children tend to recreate the same kind of marriages they grew up with. The marital relationship observed by the child acts like a blueprint upon which all future intimate relationship will be build.

Father, we ought to be our son’s first Hero and our daughter’s first love! What the children see in the family today will influence what they will do after they become parents. And the absence of a model can becomes a model in itself!

Healthy Parent Relationship Builds Emotional Security for the Children

Loving our spouse is the best way of loving our children. Great marriages make Great parents!

The most important love we can give our children is not the direct love that we give them through our relationship with them, but rather the indirect love that we give them through our loving relationship with our spouse. Such love provides security, demonstrates oneness and points to a living picture of the love between Jesus Christ and his bride.

Many love their children but had no idea that the tensions and problems in their marriages were having such a devastating impact on their offspring. A child is emotion is very much affected by the emotional climate of the home. The best way to love our children is not giving them the best education, but rather a healthy emotion and character. Intellectual ability can catch up over time; but emotional health, once destroyed, is very difficult to heal and restore.

In Prov.17:6, it says that “Children’s children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children”.

This scripture tells us that the elderly finds a ‘crown’ of reward and honor in being surrounded by grandchildren. His life has mattered, it continues on, in a sense, through succeeding generations. He has not only raised up godly sons and daughters, but he has raised them to raise up the same kind of children. There is hope for the future! Nothing so adorns children, and brightens their lives, like godly fathers and mothers. However, this is truth only realized if children take pride in their parents’ lives, and these children continue to build on the legacy left by their parents.

Third Responsibility as a Prophet – Creating a Loving Atmosphere

1Jn.4:19 –“We love Him because He first loves us”

Christ creates the atmosphere and condition for us to love God. So if there is no love in the home, generally it is the husband’s fault.

People change according to environment! If a man expects his wife to be an ‘Angel’ in his life, then he should first create a ‘Heaven’ atmosphere for her at home. On the contrary, if your house is a “Hell” environment, then you can expect a ‘Demoness’ at home. And if your house is cold and harsh like a wilderness, than your wife will be a lioness instead of a loving pussy cat.

Points to Ponder:

Husbands and Fathers, do we intentionally lead and work on our marriage in ways that cause our children to be proud of us? How would you describe your home atmosphere or environment?